i’ve been trying to accept my differences.
i forgot to take my meds before i left for school and that made me feel a little… off. during the flag-raising i couldn’t help but cringe when the commands were given. it was all so loud. and when we were singing the national anthem all i could focus on was the sound of the cymbals crashing in the background. it made my heart pound & i wanted to run away. sometimes i don’t quite understand why god created me because i am… such a wimp… yikes…
last year i read sweet bean paste by durian sukegawa (/tetsuya akikawa) and i really, really loved it. ;u; it made me cry so much. there was one part of the book i particularly loved. i remember holding my breath when i read it for the first time and i immediately went back to read it again.
From then on, I began to see everything differently. If I were not here, this full moon would not be here. Neither would the trees. Or the wind. If my view of the world disappears, then everything that I see disappears too. It’s as simple as that.
…
I began to understand that we were born in order to see and listen to the world. And that’s all the world wants of us. It doesn’t matter that I was never a teacher or a member of the workforce, my life had meaning.
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Sentaro, your life is meaningful too.
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You may never become a writer or a master doriyaki cook, but I do believe there will be a time when you can stand tall as yourself in your own unique way.
it reminds me of something my mum used to say a lot… “the origin of beauty is simplicity”. sick raeann thinks she is wimpy and mediocre and a good-for-nothing but that is untrue because no one is, and i am not an exception.
we all have beauty. i must not overcomplicate things. i am (say it!!!!!!!)… beautiful.
a face in the crowd 